

'Twas the night before Wednesday, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
Pictures are hung above the fireplace with care,
But not just in the living-room, they're everywhere;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
With visions of SpongeBob dancing in their heads;
And mamma on the couch and me with my drink,
Had just settled down to watch The Weakest Link,
When out in the back there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But an electric cable in my outlet and vanishing into the rear,
What in the #%!$ am I seeing outside my backdoor,
I knew in a moment it must be neighbor.
More rapid than eagles I grabbed my jacket and ran to the back,
And I witnessed it first hand, a cable stealing power from my jack,

"Holy, Crap! And what the #%!$!"
I'm not taking this very well,
I grab the plug and yank it out of the wall!
No, this isn't happening! Not now, not at all!"
So back inside the house I go,
What the crap are they thinking, I would like to know,
And then, in a twinkling, I heard the door bell ding-dong,
It was our neighbor saying, "I didn't mean to. Was that wrong?"
As I thought to myself - Is this person for real?
Oh yes, she is. From your neighbors it's ok to steal.
She claimed her power was out and she couldn't see in the dark of night,
And thought that stealing our electricity would give her some light,
We offered her a flashlight to go,
But she didn't need it and left saying, "No".
Strange this may seem, but it's happened before,
Just a few weeks ago they came knocking at our door,
They wanted two eggs right around midnight,
"Who bakes at this hour? That just doesn't seem right."
They even stole our sprinkler right off our lawn,
and didn't give it back till we told them that's wrong,
But there is something I have learned from this whole mess,
It's better to steal first and ask for permission later, I guess.